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Wondering about the twin souls who once wandered my womb..I never got the chance..to introduce you..two to..the world outside my reality…where are you now? Perhaps you was reborn in a third world country, or by a celebrity who named you ‘Omni’ and ‘Universah’…

I search for your souls..in every child like eyes I come across, hoping my heart beats with knowingness….knowing that you meant to find me, and tell me that, you forgive me, for not loving you from the very beginning…I was shame, because no one was proud of your existence..i remember holding your shell of picturesque potential decorated with beautiful features..

Babydoll, sometime..I feel as if it was what I did or said that caused you to leave before becoming one with me and….will I ever come to understand, why we couldn’t share more time together within our destiny? Did the needs of my inner child not leave you any space to be free..to breathe inside of my breath..as your lungs never grew to true form…I was just too worn out to blow my existence into you..for my spirit was dazed and deadlike…

Wrongly taught how to love instead of experiencing it in its right..naively tied to abuse and infidelities…pregnant with an experience not meant to keep…and so now you’re a memory unable to grow..with me..into my prime..enlightenments..you’re my remember when..mommy was back then..what she ain’t today..it comes with age..of the soul..lifetimes to hold..within the arms of my aura…

Are you…okay with mommy birthing new purposes? I know its been years but..you’ve been on my mind all of a sudden…sometimes I wonder if your souls are lingering…entangled in my fallopians…prohibiting…distant siblings..from nourishing off my bosom of being…….perhaps I’ve entered the arena of healing.

RIP Joshua & Caleb February 23 & 25, 1999

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